NFL Power 32 (Week 16 Edition)

With one week to go, the Academy sizes up where your favorite teams stand as the Playoffs lurk on the horizon:

1. (1) Green Bay Packers (14-1): Any NFC Team hoping to make it to the Super Bowl will now have to win somewhere down the line at Lambeau Field. After recovering nicely from their embarrassing loss to the Chiefs, The Packers trounced the Bears on Christmas Day and look strong going into the season finale at home against the upstart Lions.

2. (2) New Orleans Saints (12-3): Asterisk nothing. Drew Brees picked apart the Atlanta Falcons on Monday Night and earned every one of the 5,087 yards he has passed for this season. Next weeks game between Brees and Cam Newton should be a track meet and a win for New Orleans puts them in REALLY good position for a first-round bye.

3. (3) New England Patriots (12-3): The Pats looked sluggish in the first half against Miami, but came back in the second half and demonstrated why Tom Brady is Tom Brady. A win against Buffalo gives them Homefield Advantage and as tough as Lambeau Field is in January. NO ONE wants to see Foxboro on the schedule heading toward February.

4. (4) San Francisco 49ers (12-3): They escaped with a narrow victory over Seattle, but the road to a #2 seed seems pretty simple, right? Beat St. Louis and earn a free week off. But Jim Harbaugh wants to take this game VERY seriously. A win over the Panthers for the Saints paired with a loss to the Rams (even if by fluke) means Drew Brees gets a one-week vacation while the 49ers would in all likelihood host a still dangerous Falcons team.

5. (6) Pittsburgh Steelers (11-4): Charlie Batch had no problem blanking the Rams this week. As much as they don't want to be, The Steelers will have to be Bengals fans this week. A Ravens win gives them a first-round bye regardless of how badly the Steelers beat the Browns.

6. (7) Baltimore Ravens (11-4): The Ravens got a good boost from the woeful-as-always performance of opponent Cleveland, but The Bengals are fighting for a playoff spot, and they're not exactly the pushovers that Seneca Wallace and company are.

7. (9) Detroit Lions (10-5): Competing in the same conference with names like Rodgers, Brees and Manning, it's no surprise that Matthew Stafford got snubbed by Pro Bowl voters, but that doesn't make it any less disappointing. Stafford has been a solid performer all season and he proved it again this week by demolishing Pro Bowl quarterback Philip Rivers and his San Diego Chargers, knocking them out of the playoffs. He can further prove that the voters made a mistake this week by knocking off Rodgers' Packers.

8. (5) Houston Texans (10-5): After making Dan Orlovsky and the Colts look good last Thursday, maybe the Texans would be prudent to start a seasoned quarterback who isn't T.J. Yates against the surging Titans, who will be hunting for that final AFC Wild-Card.

9. (11) Cincinnati Bengals (9-6): Thanks in large part to the incredible acrobatics of Jerome Simpson, the Bengals knocked the Cardinals out of contention and are in prime position to lock up the final wild-card spot in the AFC. But can they stick the landing against Baltimore?

10. (8) Atlanta Falcons (9-6): Instead of rising up, the Falcons nearly fall out of the top ten this week after Matty Ice froze up under the lights in New Orleans. Thankfully, the Bears’ loss on Christmas Night means the Falcons won’t be left out in the cold. A win over Tampa Bay this week paired with a Lions’ loss to Green Bay could help Atlanta secure the #5 seed. This would be beneficial, as this would pit them against either Dallas or the Giants instead of San Francisco or worse, those same Saints.

11. (18) New York Giants (8-7): Winning the Battle of New Jersey helped greatly. The ground rules for next week against Dallas now are simple: Win or Go Home.

12. (19) Tennessee Titans (8-7): The Titans could still snag a playoff spot, but they’ll need help in addition to helping themselves to a victory over Houston.

13. (17) Oakland Raiders (8-7): A week after beating the Chiefs, the Raiders will be cheering them on in hopes that they upset the Broncos and present them with the AFC West title, provided that Oakland bests the Chargers first.

14. (10) Dallas Cowboys (8-7): All Jerry Jones can do is watch helplessly as his potential playoff team crumbles. The Cowboys have already had one primetime shot to send the Giants into the cellar and couldn’t get the job done. This Sunday night will be no different.

15. (13) New York Jets (8-7): The Jets teeter on the brink of missing the playoffs after losing in East Rutherford on Sunday. This week the Dolphins host them in Miami. Can’t you just feel the upset coming?

16. (12) Denver Broncos (8-7): Tebow versus Orton. You knew it would come down to this. How fitting is it that Tebow-Mania could be silenced for good by the man who lost his job in Denver to him?

17. (21) Philadelphia Eagles (7-8): The Eagles are finishing strong, unfortunately, the Jets’ loss buried any chance they had of sneaking into the postseason. After knocking around the Cowboys, the Eagles can break even at 8-8 if they can down the Redskins in the season finale.

18. (15) Seattle Seahawks (7-8): The Seahawks hopes were sunk after a two-point loss against the NFC West Champion 49ers. Now for an essentially meaningless game with fellow eliminated rival Arizona.

19. (16) Arizona Cardinals (7-8): Both Seattle and Arizona will have to decide how much draft order means to them as they head into the desert for the season closer.

20. (20) Chicago Bears (7-8): Instead of searching for a proven quarterback when Jay Cutler went down and they still had a chance for the playoffs, Lovie Smith opted to start Caleb Hanie for four consecutive weeks. And it cost them. After finally seeing the error of their ways on Christmas Day, they switched to Luke McCown, which by no means is a step up. Now the Bears can sit home and contemplate how they let the playoffs slip away because they were too stubborn to opt for a Donovan McNabb or even, dare I say it--a Brett Favre.

21. (14) San Diego Chargers (7-8): How does Norv Turner still have a job in San Diego? No, seriously. If Norv Turner maintains his position at head coach after next Sunday’s game with Oakland, I’ll be dumbstruck.

22. (23) Carolina Panthers (6-9): Be on special alert, NFL. Cam Newton is giving you a sample tasting now. Just imagine what he’ll be capable of in two, three seasons with some experience under his belt.

23. (26) Buffalo Bills (6-9): The Bills picked the perfect time to come out of their seven-game funk. After taking a little more wind out of the Tebow-lievers sails this week, they travel to Gillette Stadium to finish the year.

24. (22) Kansas City Chiefs (6-9): The Chiefs were finally dropped from the playoff picture this week after an overtime loss to Sebastian Janikowski and the Raiders, but they can still play spoiler to the Broncos in the much-anticipated battle between Orton and Tebow.

25. (25) Miami Dolphins (5-10): The Dolphins shocked countless NFL fans when they jumped out to a 17-0 lead against the Patriots, but they naturally let the game slip through their, er...flippers. They can still play spoiler to the Jets next week.

26. (24) Washington Redskins (5-10): How long do you suppose Shanahan’s leash is in the Nation’s Capitol? The finale against the Eagles might go a long way in answering that question.

27. (29) Jacksonville Jaguars (4-11): After losing yet another divisional game against the Titans, the Jaguars can deliver their fans another loss this week against the suddenly surging Colts.

28. (27) Cleveland Browns (4-11): With Pittsburgh the only opponent remaining, most Browns fans find themselves repeating the same mantra they chant every season: “Get it over with. Make it quick.”

29. (28) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-11): This is what happens when your Defensive Coordinator thinks he can handle the duties of Head Coach in addition to everything he was already doing. Maybe after the Falcons destroy them, Raheem Morris can retreat back to his original position and they can hire on a full-time head coach instead of a part-time defensive coordinator. I’m sure most Bucs fans are holding out false hope that Jon Gruden comes out of the MNF booth in the offseason...

30. (31) Minnesota Vikings (3-12): Remember Joe Webb? Evidently, Leslie Frazier didn’t. Not until Christian Ponder went down with a concussion. Otherwise, he would have pushed him to starter the same week he released Donovan McNabb instead of trying to throw Ponder into the fire. This week, they finish up the season against another team that doesn’t have a clue which quarterback gives them the best chance to win either.

31. (32) Indianapolis Colts (2-13): Archie Manning may get his wish yet. The Colts may have just won their way out of the Andrew Luck sweepstakes...They would have, if not for one minor detail...

32. (30) St. Louis Rams (2-13): The Rams have already said that if they end up with the #1 pick, they plan to sell it to someone who actually wants to draft Luck. Wow. As if Sam Bradford didn’t have enough pressure on him as it was. Now that the Rams organization has fully invested themselves in Bradford to the point of giving up the most sought-after number one draft prospect since Herschel Walker, how venomous will the hatred be if he doesn’t start to produce next season?

NFL Power 32 (Week 15 Edition)

With only two weeks left to make an impact, the Academy examines who's trending upward who's on the bubble, and who's on the downswing at the worst possible time:

1. (1) Green Bay Packers (13-1): Let the record show that I foresaw this very thing happening just last week. Aaron Rodgers fell into the trap against Kansas City and the perfect season is now over. They can, however, still snatch up Homefield Advantage with a win on Christmas Day over the struggling Bears.

2. (5) New Orleans Saints (11-3): If Drew Brees was being overlooked in the incessant chatter about Rodgers, Brady and Tebow, he definitely isn't now. After slamming the Vikings this week, they face a considerably larger challenge against the persistent Falcons next Monday night.

3. (4) New England Patriots (11-3): In spite of his defense's struggles, Brady and his offense just won't quit. The guy that so many are likening to Montana more and more each day effectively silenced Tebow Mania on Sunday with a three-score victory over the Broncos and have locked up the East as they look ahead to hosting Miami on Christmas Eve.

4. (7) San Francisco 49ers (11-3): After a disappointing loss to Arizona last week, the NFC West Champions bounced back nicely by making Ben Roethlisberger look foolish under the lights of Monday Night Football. Playoff hopeful Seattle awaits on Saturday.

5. (6) Houston Texans (10-4): T.J. Yates could only keep the momentum going for so long. Cam Newton ran all over the Texans on Sunday and its only for the grace of disappointing performances by Pittsburgh and Baltimore that they gained ground in the rankings this week. They can recover with a win on Thursday night against the Colts, who just averted a winless season on Sunday.

6. (3) Pittsburgh Steelers (10-4): What happened? These guys were odds-on-favorite to top San Francisco on Monday night and simply didn’t show up. This better not be the team that shows up in January, or next week when they host the Rams in what should be an easily-won contest.

7. (2) Baltimore Ravens (10-4): So, uh...The Ravens were 10-3 and the Chargers were 6-7? Weird. You wouldn’t have guessed based on their performances Sunday night. The Ravens should have no problem halting their skid against Cleveland next week.

8. (9) Atlanta Falcons (9-5): Matty Ice and the Falcons continue to rise up this week after knocking off the Jaguars last Thursday night. All eyes will be on New Orleans the night after Christmas.

9. (10) Detroit Lions (9-5): Wow. What a clutch drive from Matthew Stafford. The Lions now have their first winning season since 1999 and can add to it with wins over the Chargers and Green Bay in the weeks to come.

10. (14) Dallas Cowboys (8-6): The Cowboys sneak back into the top 10 this week after winning in average fashion against Tampa Bay. They’ll have to up their game for Christmas Eve if we get the same Eagles team that demolished the Jets on Sunday. THOSE Eagles are fighting for their playoff lives and could be just as dangerous as when they picked apart the Cowboys 34-7 earlier this year.

11. (13) Cincinnati Bengals (8-6): Andy Dalton and company gain ground with a routine victory over the Rams on Sunday. A win over Arizona can put them in really good position for a Wild Card spot.

12. (11) Denver Broncos (8-6): Tebow talk was quelled this week as Tom Brady ran roughshod in the second half. Still, the Broncos can sink the Chiefs hopes for good with a win on Saturday over Buffalo.

13. (8) New York Jets (8-6): Mark Sanchez looked lost in Philadelphia this week, but should be right at home on Saturday. Unfortunately, so will the Giants. We’ll find out who owns the Meadowlands in five short days.

14. (18) San Diego Chargers (7-7): The Chargers aren’t dead yet, especially with the Raiders on a steady decline and the Broncos proving that they aren’t exactly consistent. Upcoming games with Detroit and Oakland will make it an uphill battle, though.

15. (19) Seattle Seahawks (7-7): A 24-point blowout over the Bears proved that Seattle is more equipped for another playoff run than Chicago is with Caleb Hanie running the show. A couple more divisional games to get out of the way will tell the tale.

16. (20) Arizona Cardinals (7-7): Arizona and Seattle are both in decent shape to snap up a Wild-Card spot, but Cleveland shouldn’t present as much of a challenge as they did. If they can’t handle the Bengals, it could create a problem going into the season finale.

17. (17) Oakland Raiders (7-7): The Raiders maintain their position despite a devastating last second collapse at home against the Lions. They’ll look to regain traction against the barely breathing Chiefs on Saturday.

18. (12) New York Giants (7-7): It seems that the Redskins have Eli Manning’s number this year. What a pity, just as they start what looked to be a resurgence, they get slapped back down into mediocrity. At this point, a loss to the Jets is one they simply cannot afford.

19. (16) Tennessee Titans (7-7): Might be safe to sleep on the Titans, now. After giving the winless Colts their first win of the season, Tennessee limps back home to host the Jaguars this week.

20. (15) Chicago Bears (7-7): WHY ARE YOU STILL STARTING CALEB HANIE? Christmas Day will turn into “The Year Without a Santa Claus” for the Bears if they continue to start the worst quarterback since Tim Couch against a Packers team whose wounded pride is liable to have them angry and vengeful next Sunday.

21. (21) Philadelphia Eagles (6-8): It’s a long shot, but after eviscerating the Jets on Sunday, the Eagles could swipe the NFC East if all three teams in contention finish the year 8-8. Unbelievable. A good place to start in Christmas Eve in Dallas.

22. (23) Kansas City Chiefs (6-8): They said it couldn’t be done, but Romeo, Orton and the Chiefs felled Goliath on Sunday and still have a ghost of a chance to secure the AFC West, a chance so fragile that it could be wrecked by either failing to put away the Raiders or by a Buffalo loss on Saturday.

23. (26) Carolina Panthers (5-9): We got another glimmer of what Cam Newton might be capable of in the future this week as the Panthers put the brakes on the Texans pursuit of the #1 seed in the AFC. With Tampa Bay coming up, Carolina should collect at least one more win before meeting the Saints on New Year’s Day.

24. (25) Washington Redskins (5-9): Shanahan’s crew may have been out of contention since mid-November but they’ve very proficiently been playing the role of spoiler as Tom Coughlin and the Giants found out Sunday. Another manageable game against the Vikings lies ahead later this week.

25. (28) Miami Dolphins (5-9): The outing at Buffalo was impressive, but the one venue you never want to see on your schedule in December is Gillette Stadium--Foxborough, MA. Sorry Miami, this will NOT end well.

26. (22) Buffalo Bills (5-9): Remember when these guys were 5-2? Well, they show up again next week (I can’t even bring myself to say that they MIGHT win anymore) against the Denver Broncos...So, that should be fun for Tebow.

27. (27) Cleveland Browns (4-10): Do you think Mike Holmgren has begun plotting out what order in the draft his first round pick will fall? With the final two games being Baltimore and Pittsburgh, my wager is that he won’t have to wait too long to make his move.

28. (29) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-10): The Bucs showed a few fading signs of life against a subpar Cowboys team on Saturday night and only gained a spot because it now appears that the Jaguars have also quit. Just sit on the sideline and watch as Carolina and Atlanta pick up wins at your expense in the next couple of weeks.

29. (24) Jacksonville Jaguars (4-10): There was practically no effort to mask the fact that the Jaguars were outmatched and outclassed last Thursday night. Can they pull an improbable upset out of their hats in the next two weeks and save face with a 6-10 record?

30. (31) St. Louis Rams (2-12): Sam Bradford can take heart in the fact that his team was competitive in defeat this week. Against the Steelers, that won’t be the case.

31. (30) Minnesota Vikings (2-12): Christian Ponder and Sam Bradford continue to trade spots in the next to last spot on the chart, this week, Ponder got the worst of it, by fortune of having to play against Drew Brees. That almost never has a promising conclusion. A toss-up game with the Redskins will go a long way in determining draft order.

32. (32) Indianapolis Colts (1-13): The Peyton Manning-less Colts remain in the basement this week in spite of their improbable first win of the season, because, let’s face it, they are still in prime position to secure Andrew Luck. A loss on Thursday night to the Texans will all but seal it up.

NFL Power 32 (Week 14 Edition)

Down the stretch they come.

The Academy presents a look at where your favorite teams stand, with only three weeks left to make a good impression. Let's take a look at whose stock is on the rise, who might be headed for a fall, and who might come out of nowhere in the few weeks that are left:

1. (1) Green Bay Packers (13-0): We said the same thing around Thanksgiving Day. The Green Bay Packers best chance of being defeated lies with the Detroit Lions in the season finale. And it's still true. After a fierce thrashing of the Oakland Raiders, the Pack looks ahead to Kansas City, who just got eliminated from playoff contention and fired their head coach. Be warned, Aaron Rodgers. Fewer things are more dangerous than a team with nothing left to play for and a defensive wizard like Romeo Crennel now at the helm...

2. (5) Baltimore Ravens (10-3): The Ravens got a big boost from playing the listless Colts this week, but as long as they keep winning, they’ve got the AFC North on lockdown having swept the Steelers. A victory over the unpredictable Chargers paired with a 49ers win over Pittsburgh on Monday could give them some breathing room.

3. (3) Pittsburgh Steelers (10-3): The Steelers hold their position with a gritty, in the trenches victory over bitter rival Cleveland this week, but will need help from San Diego to try and push themselves back in front for a chance at a higher seed.

4. (6) New England Patriots (10-3): The Patriots get a jump this week, but questionable defensive play matched with a less-than-perfect outing by Brady clouds an otherwise 100% certainty that they could be the ones to extinguish the recent “Tebow Magic” that has been infecting the league and its analysts.

5. (4) New Orleans Saints (10-3): The Saints snatched up a playoff spot this week, but the win over Tennessee on Sunday was too close for comfort in a division where the Falcons are breathing down their neck.

6. (7) Houston Texans (10-3): Houston has won their division for the first time since the days of “Love Ya, Blue”. And they did it with a third-string quarterback. Wonders never cease. Cam Newton and the Panthers come to town this week, and nothing is for certain when playing against last year’s #1 pick.

7. (2) San Francisco 49ers (10-3): The 49ers REALLY didn’t need that loss to the Cardinals with the Steelers and Seahawks on the docket in the next two weeks...

8. (8) New York Jets (8-5): The Jets are still in really good shape for a position in January, but neither the Eagles nor the Giants will be as easy to dismantle as the Chiefs were on Sunday.

9. (12) Atlanta Falcons (8-5): As the ranking indicates, The Dirty Birds continue to “rise up”, but they have to play much better than they did Sunday against Carolina. Look for the Falcons to go into overdrive on Thursday night against the Jaguars, because Week 16 in the Superdome is going to be CRITICAL.

10. (14) Detroit Lions (8-5): The win against struggling Minnesota was expected, but necessary. With Oakland, San Diego and the undefeated Packers on the way, the Lions need to stop getting in their own way. Making stupid mistakes at this juncture will prove very costly.

11. (10) Denver Broncos (8-5): Does someone want to tell Tim Tebow that he can’t afford to fall behind this week against the Patriots? “Tebow Magic” is real, for what it’s worth, but it has a limit. That limit is the performance of Tom Brady. The clock strikes midnight for Cinderella this week.

12. (17) New York Giants (7-6): Even in loss to the Packers, it’s as though the Giants have had new life breathed into them. Their come from behind victory Sunday night to reclaim the division lead from the Cowboys was impressive to say the least. Can they keep the momentum going against the Redskins next Sunday?

13. (16) Cincinnati Bengals (7-6): The Bengals benefited from several middle-of-the-pack teams dropping their games this week or having a less than stellar win. The defense really let them down in the closing seconds on Sunday. If they hope to find a spot in the playoffs, their issues will have to be fine tuned over the course of this week. No game is a gimmie at this point, even the Rams. The Cardinals proved that they’re not the team to sleep on and Baltimore is a brick wall the Bengals will have to overcome in Week 17.

14. (11) Dallas Cowboys (7-6): Sunday night was the kind of loss that usually heralds how the Cowboys will perform in the closing weeks of the season. With that demoralizing loss in the books, the Cowboys are a psychological wreck. The Eagles and Giants will be the hardest games Dallas has ever played and even Tampa Bay will give Romo a run for his money.

15. (13) Chicago Bears (7-6): WHY ARE YOU STILL STARTING CALEB HANIE? If they don’t put in a decent starting quarterback in the next three weeks, the Seahawks, the Packers and yes, even the Vikings will tear them apart.

16. (9) Tennessee Titans (7-6): Jake Locker was superb again this week, but the loss was crucial. Fortunately, they won’t have to fight too hard to stay in contention over the next couple weeks in games against the Colts and Jaguars.

17. (15) Oakland Raiders (7-6): Oakland is tanking at the most inopportune time, leaving the division wide open to Tebow and the slowly recovering Chargers. A win over the Lions and Chiefs could help silence the whispers.

18. (18) San Diego Chargers (6-7): The Chargers are looking like the team that they should have been during their six-game losing streak. Who knew that a last-second fumble on Monday night football could be so impactful? Big challenges ahead, but San Diego has the potential to drastically change the landscape of the AFC West in the next few weeks.

19. (19) Seattle Seahawks (6-7): The Seahawks effectively handled the Rams Monday night and may yet pull out a 9-7 mark, which may yet earn them a #6 seed, but they’ll need the Bears and Cowboys to fold first. Incidentally, this is very possible.

20. (21) Arizona Cardinals (6-7): An unexpected win over the 49ers keeps Arizona alive, barely. A win over Cleveland next week will help them pull even, but they still need assistance from Chicago, Dallas and Seattle collapses in order to squeeze into the same #6 slot they’re all fighting for.

21. (27) Philadelphia Eagles (5-8): Michael Vick came back just in time. A loss to the Jets next Sunday will sink them for sure, but as long as the Cowboys and Giants are hit-and-miss, the Eagles could still mathematically win out and steal the division out from under both of them.

22. (22) Buffalo Bills (5-8): The AFC East has become a two-team race. So disappointing. Buffalo is 0-6 since shutting out the Redskins. Early hope extinguished by the grind of midseason.

23. (20) Kansas City Chiefs (5-8): Season: Over. Head Coach: Fired. Next opponent: Undefeated. Interim Coach: Defensive Wizard. Odds of Winning: unlikely to mildly probable. Teams with nothing left to play for are unpredictable.

24. (29) Jacksonville Jaguars (4-9): Blaine Gabbert did a serious number on the Bucs on Sunday, but in all likelihood will only pick up one more win (the Colts) on the home stretch.

25. (26) Washington Redskins (4-9): Where did that come from? After nearly upsetting The Brady Bunch on Sunday, Shanahan’s crew meets with the Giants this week (having already upset them in Week One) and has a winnable game against Minnesota followed by a slightly less winnable game against the Eagles still on the horizon.

26. (24) Carolina Panthers (4-9): Cam Newton could tell you that his team knows how to write a formula for losing a game, but the formula won’t be needed this week in Houston or in the season finale at New Orleans.

27. (25) Cleveland Browns (4-9): No offensive production, no progress, no victories. The Browns will finish 4-12. Count on it.

28. (23) Miami Dolphins (4-9): A loss to the Eagles provides another bump in the road for the team that limped to an 0-7 start. They’ll snatch up another win this week against the Bills, but with games against the Pats and Jets still to come, that’s where it ends.

29. (28) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-9): It seems every year you can pick out at least one or two teams that have given up by Week 13. This season, it’s the Bucs. Tampa Bay has quit on themselves. The last three games of the season are merely a courtesy to the NFL Regular Season schedule makers as far as the Buccaneers are concerned, and that’s unfortunate.

30. (30) Minnesota Vikings (2-11): Christian Ponder got them close against the Lions, but at the end of the day, it’s still the Vikings. The Saints, Redskins and Bears will all greatly appreciate the victories coming their way.

31. (30) St. Louis Rams (2-11): Just another day in the miserable career of Sam Bradford. Poor kid, he has no supporting cast other than Steven Jackson. It’s not getting any easier the rest of the way either. At least they’ll only finish with the second worst record in the league...

32. (32) Indianapolis Colts (0-13): The Colts will seal up Andrew Luck in two weeks. They can wrap it up next week in the unlikely event that the Rams and Vikings both win. In any case, the Colts aren’t winning a game this season.

NFL Power 32 Rankings

Four weeks ago, The Academy of One released a Midseason Report Card to give their analysis on the respective performances of each team within the National Football League. In the month since, a few franchises have maintained their spot, others have improved or fallen drastically. To record where each team currently stands, allow us to introduce The NFL Power 32 for the week ending December 5:

1. (1) Green Bay Packers (12-0): The remaining schedule looks comfortable, and Homefield Advantage for the moment is a mere three wins away. These guys know how to do that, right? Be warned though: the last team to finish the regular season undefeated ended up tripping at the finish line...

2. (2) San Francisco 49ers (10-2): Pittsburgh is the greatest remaining challenge, but Jim Harbaugh and company don’t want to take their eyes off the prize. No one knows them better than their division rivals, and they play them all one more time.

3. (4) Pittsburgh Steelers (9-3): After throttling legitimate playoff contender Cincinnati on Sunday, a can’t miss game with the 49ers looms, but bitter rival Cleveland stands in the way tomorrow night.

4. (5) New Orleans Saints (9-3): How is it possible that Drew Brees is being overshadowed by Brady and Rodgers when he’s the only QB this season who has already surpassed 4,000 passing yards and is tied for second in touchdown passes? It doesn’t seem possible, but in the midst of the Packers undefeated season--could the Saints, who just two seasons ago won it all, be getting overlooked? You can bet that the Titans aren’t looking past them this week.

5. (8) Baltimore Ravens (9-3): Yes. The Ravens do own a sweep over the Steelers and thus the undisputed tie-breaker. However, Flacco has been less than prolific as of late, being outdone in passing yards by Colt McCoy last week while Peyton Hillis outperformed all Ravens’ receivers with only 52 receiving yards. In short, Baltimore is investing all hope for their playoffs future in the ground performance of Ray Rice and the stingy play of their defense. Those go, The Ravens go. A date with the winless Colts should push Baltimore to 10-3 this week.

6. (6) New England Patriots (9-3): The fact that the Patriots have arguably the softest remaining schedule of any team in the league borders on suspicious, until you realize that Tom Brady continues to win in spite of a Swiss Cheese Defense. Hate him all you want (I do), but the long and short of it is that Brady has proven time and time again that winning just comes naturally. Look for the Pats to shine again this week against Shanahan’s Redskins.

7. (3) Houston Texans (9-3): How they continue to defy the odds, considering the injury to their first two starting quarterbacks, the loss of Mario Williams and the constant injury patterns of Andre Johnson, is nothing short of baffling. It’s a wonder that the team has held together, let alone is in position to secure a playoff spot for the first time since Bud Adams retired the word “Oilers”. Cincy and Tennessee will be teams to keep an eye out for...

8. (16) New York Jets (7-5): The Jets have bounced back nicely from the disappointing loss against the Broncos on Thursday night and are right back in the race for a Wild Card spot. Their remaining opponents have an aggregate record of 19-29, so the odds favor them for at least the #6 seed.

9. (14) Tennessee Titans (7-5): Don’t rule out the Titans just yet. All eyes could be on Texans-Titans when Week 17 rolls around to see who snatches up the #3 or #4 seed.

10. (18) Denver Broncos (7-5): The Cinderella story is living on borrowed time. The Patriots come to Denver in two weeks, and Tim Tebow is in store for a SERIOUS reality check. The Patriots have a very real capability to send the Broncos into a tailspin for the last three weeks.

11. (13) Dallas Cowboys (7-5): No team is more hit or miss than the Dallas Cowboys. One week, they’re destroying the Bills, other weeks, they squeak by the Redskins, get picked apart by the Eagles or cough up a game that they had won in overtime by icing their own kicker. Tony Romo is consistent in his inconsistency, perhaps the most inconsistent starting quarterback in the league. Knowing the depths of the bad and the limits of the good, it’s not out of the realm of possibility to see the Cowboys miss the playoffs yet.

12. (15) Atlanta Falcons (7-5): A soft remaining schedule makes a playoff appearance very manageable, but they can’t allow themselves to get beaten by a T.J. Yates every week. The loss to Houston and their third-string quarterback is utterly inexcusable.

13. (7) Chicago Bears (7-5): Since losing Jay Cutler, the Bears and Caleb Hanie are 0-2. Yet the Bears, who are still very much alive in the playoff race refuse to extend a hand to Donovan McNabb or another free agent QB who can get the job done. So any subsequent loss is essentially self-inflicted.

14. (11) Detroit Lions (7-5): Suh’s “Two-Step” on Thanksgiving Day has the Lions frantically scrambling to put the cork back in the bottle of lightning that they captured through the first five games this season. Sunday night’s loss to the Saints wasn’t a good start. They might catch a reprieve playing against the Vikings without Suh this week, but they better not let their guard down.

15. (12) Oakland Raiders (7-5): The Raiders got a little too comfortable with their position atop the division and it proved costly. An old fashioned whipping by the Dolphins and another Tebow Houdini act pushes them into a tie for first, and the Broncos own the tie-breaker at the worst possible time, with games against Green Bay, Detroit and the other two division rivals still on the road ahead.

16. (10) Cincinnati Bengals (7-5): After a very impressive performance this season by their rookie QB-WR connection, the nasty loss to Pittsburgh on Sunday is a little unsettling. Can the Bengals shake this off and recover in time to secure a Wild Card spot?

17. (9) New York Giants (6-6): The 6-6 record doesn’t do this team justice. Over the course of this season, they’ve gotten the best of the Patriots, came within a score of tipping the 49ers and were easily the greatest challenge to the Packers’ thus far undefeated season on Sunday. A win over the Cowboys Sunday night could make the NFC East playoff race VERY interesting.

18. (19) San Diego Chargers (5-7): Just when you thought the Chargers were content to roll over and die for the rest of the season, they produce a convincing victory over the sputtering Jaguars on Monday Night. Norv Turner’s not off the hot seat yet, though...If the Chargers can’t somehow escape with the AFC West title, the coach may yet be shown the door.

19. (23) Seattle Seahawks (5-7): After dismantling the Eagles this past week, if the Seahawks can create an upset atmosphere at home when they host the 49ers in two weeks, they could walk away from the season with a respectable 9-7 mark in spite of their rocky start.

20. (20) Kansas City Chiefs (5-7): Tyler Palko produced a pleasant surprise by knocking off the Bears this week. But with a team that is largely still contending for the AFC West title, most Chiefs fans would likely feel more comfortable with Kyle Orton behind the wheel for the last four games. Especially considering the final four games are two remaining divisional games against Oakland and Denver a game against the Jets and another versus the undefeated Packers.

21. (24) Arizona Cardinals (5-7): The Cardinals caught a break this week when somebody made the decision to ice his own kicker (what an idiot). Though they are essentially playing for nothing with the NFC West locked up, The Cardinals look like a team that won’t quit. This is good, because they can’t expect the 49ers, Bengals or Seattle to make the same mistakes Dallas did.

22. (17) Buffalo Bills (5-7): At midseason, this team was one game out of first place in the AFC East. What happened?! Winless since the shutout against the Redskins. Winless since before HALLOWEEN. The team that started with such promise could be finished with a loss to the Chargers this week or a Patriots victory over the Redskins. You can probably count on at least the latter.

23. (28) Miami Dolphins (4-8): The Dolphins are 4-1 since falling to 0-7. The only thing preventing them from being 5-7 is a one-point loss in the final moments of the Thanksgiving Game against the Cowboys. So the question becomes; after drubbing one division leader and nearly knocking off another, why did you wait until this late in the season to start the surge?

24. (30) Carolina Panthers (4-8): The Falcons, Texans and Saints won’t be easy, but if Cam Newton can take advantage of a third string QB in Houston and familiarity among division rivals, The Panthers could conceivably escape with an 8-8 record, but 6-10 looks more likely.

25. (25) Cleveland Browns (4-8): Colt McCoy had the unfortunate duty of playing against the projected AFC North Champion Ravens this week. Tomorrow night, it’s the Steelers, and the Ravens play host in two weeks. Start planning your Draft Position now, because you’ll be somewhere in the first ten picks.

26. (27) Washington Redskins (4-8): The ‘Skins had the Jets on the rope throughout the first half on Sunday. Too bad they didn’t get the memo to finish the fourth quarter...This week’s game with the Patriots will be the biggest remaining challenge, but rivalry games with the Giants and Eagles won’t be cakewalks, either...

27. (26) Philadelphia Eagles (4-8): The wheels have fallen off. Losing to Seattle means the Eagles would have to win out while Dallas and the Giants would in all likelihood have to lose the remainder of the schedule in order for Philly to have a chance. Since the Cowboys and Giants still have two games against each other, that won’t happen. Better luck next season. Maybe don’t hire an Offensive Line Coach to be your Defensive Coordinator next time. Sorry Juan Castillo, you’re in the WRONG position.

28. (21) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-8): The Bucs were handled expertly by Cam Newton this week and still face the season finale with the Panthers in Carolina. However, if Tampa can assume the role of spoiler, they could still send Cowboys and Falcons’ fans home unhappy come January.

29. (22) Jacksonville Jaguars (3-9): Teams that fire their head coach three quarters of the way through the season usually don’t finish well, which means that the Buccaneers might actually reverse their fortune briefly this Sunday. A game against the winless Colts in Week 17 could even be spoiled by a highly unlikely, but still remotely possible return of Peyton Manning.

30. (31) Minnesota Vikings (2-10): Tebow and the Broncos just barely escaped the Metrodome with a win. The Saints game in two weeks is un-winnable, but with the Redskins, the imploding Lions and the Cutler-less Bears on the horizon, the Vikings could conceivably pull three games out of the remaining schedule.

31. (29) St. Louis Rams (2-10): The remaining schedule looks pretty ugly, especially after letting the NFC West Champions shut them out on Sunday. The Rams play under the lights Monday night, but still have games against the Bengals, Steelers and one more round with the 'Niners.

32. (32) Indianapolis Colts (0-12): They can lock up the Andrew Luck sweepstakes in three weeks. Even if Archie Manning and everyone else doesn't think they want it, trust me, they do.

WWE Survivor Series Fantasy Card PPV Results 11/20/11 Pt. 5

Santino Marella enters the ring and greets the fans in the World's Most Famous Arena and talks about how he was scheduled to compete tonight but is now unable to due to the number that Kevin Nash put on him last Monday. John Laurinaitis enters and tells Santino that he understands his predicament and has arranged for a match tonight. Laurinaitis says he has gone out of his way to ensure that Santino has the shortest contest of the evening that requires the least amount of work. After a pause, the imposing figure of Brodus Clay steps onto the entrance ramp. Brodus storms down to the ring and the match is underway.

Santino Marella v. Brodus Clay

Undeterred, Santino attempts a suplex to no avail. Brodus attempts a clothesline but Santino quickly dodges with a split and attempts a hip toss, which Clay counters by clubbing Santino in the back of the head. Brodus helps Santino back to his feet and Marella counters with a Santino Stunner.

Santino continues after the staggering Clay with a wind-up punch combination that brings him down to one knee. Rebounding off the ropes, Marella drops a Saluting Headbutt to the back of Brodus’ neck.

Santino sets up for the Cobra, but before he can strike, Brodus takes hold with a Tongan Death Grip and drops The Italian Stallion with a chokeslam. Clay stalks Santino and once on his feet, Marella falls victim to a Running Cross Body Block as Brodus picks up the easy win.

Winner: Brodus Clay

Wade Barrett walking in the Gorilla Position with the eight other members of Nexus directs traffic. Barrett sends all eight to the luxury boxes of MSG. Barrett dispatches Otunga, Slater, Gabriel and Sheffield to the left entrance and Harris, Jackson, Ryan and McGillicutty to the right entrance. Barrett knocks on the door to an unmarked dressing room and tells those inside that the troops are in position. Presumably speaking to his new partner in crime, Barrett asks if he’s ready to go but gets no answer. The Nexus leader opens the dressing room door just enough to get in and quietly closes the door behind himself.

Traditional Survivor Series 5-on-5 Elimination Tag Team Match:

Team Punk
(CM Punk, The Rock, John Cena, Sheamus and Triple H)
versus
Team Del Rio
(WWE Champion Alberto Del Rio, The Awesome Truth, Christian and Kevin Nash)

Justin Roberts introduces Ricardo Rodriguez and the WWE Champion enters first, followed by Christian, The Awesome Truth and finally Kevin Nash, who is joined by John Laurinaitis. The interim RAW GM explains that he will be in the corner of team Del Rio for this contest. Punk enters and cuts a promo on the whole team, telling them that they picked the perfect manager as he is a reflection of just how one-dimensional each and every one of them truly is: “It is my Destiny”, “One More Match”, “Little Jimmy”, “I’m Awesome”, “Why can’t I walk three feet without ending up on crutches?” enough already.” Punk calls Nash “Vinnie Vegas” and suggests that he go home and give his dice a good blow. Punk says it doesn’t matter who’s in their corner and turns his attention to Laurinaitis, telling him that should he get involved tonight, that “Funk Man” might find himself getting franchised before the night’s over.

Sheamus enters next and is followed shortly after by John Cena, the WWE COO and The Rock. The four of them pause on the entrance ramp and clear a path for their corner man--VINCE MCMAHON! The team makes a beeline for the ring and the entire ringside area breaks into utter chaos. Somehow the ref restores order and the match gets underway.

Triple H and Kevin Nash start. Nash no more than throws a Big Boot and chaos takes over yet again. In the midst of the brawl, Vince McMahon actually tackles Laurinaitis and begins to pummel him. The remaining four members of Team Del Rio rush to pull Vince off, which draws the other four members of Team Punk to fight off Team Del Rio. The ref toils to separate the parties, all the while turning his attention away from the match at hand. Nash sets up for a Jackknife Powerbomb, but Triple H blocks, drops to his knees and delivers a vile low blow. With Nash reeling, Triple H easily applies a double underhook and plants Nash with a Pedigree. The ref slides back into the ring in time to log the three count and the match’s first elimination. Triple H, however, is not satisfied with merely pinning his former friend.

As Nash writhes in pain on the canvas, Triple H reaches under the ring apron and pulls out his sledgehammer. A demonic look flashes across The Game’s face as he slides back into the ring. Sledge in hand, Triple H places a firm boot down on Nash’s ankle, holding him in place. Shawn Michaels and Sean Waltman come tearing down the entrance ramp, begging The Cerebral Assassin to reconsider. But the Game has made up his mind. Triple H raises the hammer high above his head and spikes the weight directly into Kevin Nash’s kneecap. Nash is screaming in pain on the verge of sobbing, but the King of King’s isn’t done. Triple H steps on Nash’s right ankle now. In virtually a repeated motion, Triple H shatters Nash’s other kneecap. Nash is rolling in agony, burying his face in the mat to muffle his screams.

The ref has disqualified Triple H at this point. Chioda throws up the "X" signal to bring officials down to ringside. As officials convene, Triple H brandishes the sledge at all of them, keeping them off the ring apron, then turns his attention back to the nearly motionless Nash. Placing one boot squarely on Nash's back, The Game lifts the Sledge one last time and plants the head right to the back of Nash's skull. As the EMTs carry Nash away, Triple H throws the Sledgehammer down and leaves the ring.

Sheamus and Christian start in place of their respective eliminated partners. After a brief staredown, Christian slaps Sheamus across the face. An infuriated Sheamus responds with a frenzy of face and body slaps and clobbers Christian with a spinning backfist. Christian staggers to the ropes where Sheamus connects with no fewer than twenty Hammer Blows before taking Captain Charisma off his feet with a Polish Hammer. Sheamus covers and gets two. Sheamus connects with a high knee lift and proceeds to hand countless knee drops to the back of Christian’s head before the ref has to call him off. As the ref separates the two, Christian sneaks in another slap and catches Sheamus on the charge with a flapjack for a one count.

Christian capitalizes with a rope choke before vaulting to the outside and slapping Sheamus a third time. Scaling to the top rope, Christian attempts a diving headbutt, but Sheamus moves at the last second. The Celtic Warrior goes to the top rope himself to attempt a Battering Ram, but Christian dodges, and Sheamus rolls through retreating to the outside. From the ring apron, Sheamus springboards and connects with the Battering Ram anyway. Christian kicks out at two. Sheamus attempts a short-arm clothesline, but Christian counters into a roll-up and gets a two count. Sheamus comes back with a Fallaway Slam, but Christian again counters into an Implant DDT for two. It seems that everything Sheamus attempts, Christian has an answer for. Sheamus whips Christian to the corner out of frustration and charges, only to walk into a Pendulum Kick and a Flashpoint Elbow. However, as Christian attempts the Flashpoint, Sheamus catches him mid-leap and connects instead with a Inverted Facelock Backbreaker. Incredibly, Christian escapes at 2 1/2.

Sheamus whips The Live-Wire to the buckle again, but this time, Christian counters with a Springboard Sunset Flip. Sheamus rolls through and throws a boot directly into Christian’s face, nearly picking up the three.

Sheamus primes up to deliver a Brogue Kick and Christian dodges again, locking in an attempted Killswitch. Sheamus shoves off, sending Christian off the ropes. Christian counters with a Spear and picks up a two-and-a-half as Christian argues with the ref out of disbelief. Backing into a corner, Christian primes for another Spear. Sheamus catches him mid-charge and drops Christian with an Irish Curse for another two count.

Now Sheamus’ temper is starting to flare. Getting back to his feet, Sheamus drops Christian with a running powerslam and goes for the cover. Christian averts yet again by getting his foot on the bottom rope. Out on his feet, Christian takes a Brogue Kick and becomes easy pickings for a High Cross Powerbomb and FINALLY Sheamus logs the three to eliminate Christian.

Alberto Del Rio rushes into the ring from behind and drops Sheamus with a Backstabber. The WWE Champion follows up with a Jumping Armbreaker. Del Rio picks up a vulnerable Sheamus and locks in the Flying Cross Armbreaker. Sheamus struggles valiantly for about three minutes before being left with no other option but to tap out.

Del Rio comes away from the cover and finds himself in a staredown with The Rock. After a tie-up, Rock Irish whips Del Rio into the corner and throws a flurry of punches before capping with the thrust punch. Del Rio charges out of the corner and into an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. The WWE Champion retreats to his corner and tags in The Miz. The Rock throws a flying clothesline, Miz recovers and walks into a Samoan Drop and kicks out at two. The Great One hits a Float-Over DDT, kips up and locks in a sharpshooter. Miz struggles and reaches the bottom rope to break the hold. Rock attempts a swinging neckbreaker, but Miz rolls out, kicks Rocky in the knee and drops him with a Kneeling DDT.

Miz cinches in a Dragon Sleeper, but the Rock struggles out and eventually tosses Miz off with a Back Body Drop. Rock crawls to the tag and in comes John Cena. Wanting nothing to do with a fresh Cena, Miz tags in R-Truth. Truth throws a Scissors Kick, but Cena dodges and comes back with a sitout Hip Toss and a one-handed bulldog for two.

Cena attempts a dropkick, but Truth blocks and connects with a Vertical Suplex Stunner for a very close two count. Truth throws a kick, but Cena catches and Truth counters with a spinning heel enziguri. Truth connects with a Sitout Suplex Slam, but Cena kicks out again. Truth hits the top turnbuckle and connects with a 450 splash, but Cena kicks out at two and gets back to his feet with Truth in tow. Cena hoists Truth onto his shoulders for an FU, but Truth demonstrates incredible agility by landing on his feet and rebounding with a Lie Detector for another two count.

Cena tags to CM Punk and Punk appears ready to lock up with Truth, but Truth thinks better of it, tagging back to the WWE Champion. Del Rio throws an Enziguri, but only logs a two count. Punk recovers, but Del Rio whips him to the outside. Punk climbs back onto the apron and hits a can opener to soften up Del Rio. Punk locks in an arm wrench and throws a mule kick that sends the WWE Champion stumbling into the corner. Punk hits the shining wizard and drops Del Rio with a bulldog out of the corner.

Punk mounts the top rope as the “Randy Savage” chants start in again. Punk connects with a Diving Elbow Smash and collects a 2 3/4 count. Punk debates the count with the ref, but to no avail. As Del Rio gets back to his feet, Punk throws a Roundhouse kick to the temple, sending the champion crumbling to the mat. As CM Punk signals for the GTS, Ricardo Rodriguez intervenes, jumping up on the apron. Punk drags him into the action and drops him with Go To Sleep instead. The distraction was enough, however, as Del Rio stealthily sneaks in and locks in the Flying Cross Armbreaker. Punk struggles and fights for several minutes to get to the bottom rope to break the hold.

Ever the innovator, Punk uses his free arm not to break the hold, but to climb from the bottom rope to the middle rope and gain enough traction to roll Del Rio over into a Schoolboy pin with the Armbreaker still locked in. For good measure, Punk latches his foot onto the middle rope (unbeknownst to the ref) and logs the three count. Outraged, Del Rio tries to plead and explain what happened to the referee. Ref turns his attention to Punk, but The Straight Edge Superstar just innocently shrugs off Del Rio’s claim. The ref ushers the WWE Champion out of the ring and Del Rio is eliminated.

The Miz rushes into the ring with a knee lift and drops Punk with a Reality Check. Miz connects with an inverted facelock backbreaker into a neckbreaker for another two count. Miz whips Punk to the buckle and lands a Clothesline out of the corner. Before Punk can regain his senses, Miz drops him with a Snapmare Driver into the canvas. Punk resiliently kicks out and now it’s Miz’ turn to argue with the ref. Punk recovers and sets up for GTS. Miz throws a few elbows and escapes into position for a Skull-Crushing Finale. Miz goes for the cover and John Laurinaitis holds down Punk’s legs out of view of the referee while Miz logs a three count and Punk is eliminated.

With a clear look of disgust on his face regarding what transpired, Punk turns his attention to Laurinaitis. The interim RAW GM tries to bolt, but Punk signals for Cena and The Rock to pursue him. Vince McMahon guides him into the ring by the collar of his suit jacket and Punk hoists him onto his shoulders. Punk drops Laurinaitis with the GTS and Madison Square Garden loves it. Punk leaves, still frustrated and we’re down to Cena and the Rock versus The Awesome Truth.
Cena runs in and drops The Miz with a Throwback and a Protobomb before throwing a series of Shoulderblocks, the third of which puts Miz in position for the Five-Knuckle Shuffle. Cena taunts Truth with the “You Can’t See Me” wave and sets up for the FU. Truth makes a blind tag and Miz counters out in time for Truth to connect with Little Jimmy’s Finale and make the cover and the three count. John Cena has been eliminated.

The Rock is now all alone against The Awesome Truth. Truth and Rock exchange blows for several minutes, before Truth jams a thumb into Rocky’s eye. Truth lines up for Little Jimmy, but The Rock grabs the top rope for leverage, sending Truth crashing to the mat. The Rock gears up, waiting for Truth to get back to his feet and drops him with The Rock Bottom. The Rock picks up a three count eliminating R-Truth and it’s down to The Rock and The Miz. Miz jumps The Rock from behind, setting up for the Skull-Crushing Finale, but Rock drops to his knees sending The Miz rolling. Miz charges directly into a Spinebuster. The Rock hits the People’s Elbow and picks up the three count to end the match.

Winner and Sole Survivor: The Rock

The Rock celebrates his victory, going to all corners with fist in the air before The Miz yanks him off of the turnbuckles leading to a 2-on-1 beatdown by The Awesome Truth. John Cena runs back in to fight off the assault. Cena hits an FU on Truth while The Rock drops Miz with a Rock Bottom, sending both men retreating up the entrance ramp.

It’s at this time, that Wade Barrett sends the Nexus down from the luxury box, through the crowd and over the barricade. Nexus surrounds the ring, climb onto the apron and step into the ring, surrounding The Rock and John Cena. Cena and The Rock stand back-to-back prepared to fight off the barrage.

Just as it seems that The Rock and John Cena will end up on the business end of a 9-on-2 mugging, Cena steps aside, taking the spot next to Wade Barrett and fully encircling The Rock. Cena stands directly in front of The Rock, stonefaced. Without warning, Cena throws The Rock a People’s Eyebrow, cueing the rest of Nexus to attack. Unbelievable. Cena stands back and watches the carnage as the new partner in leadership of The Nexus!

All members of The Nexus beat the Rock down with their respective finishers, ending with a Barrett Wasteland and Gabriel’s 450 Splash. After the damage has been done, Cena steps in to direct traffic, sending The Nexus to the back. Cena now turns his attention to The Rock and the assault continues.

Cena grabs his old lock and chain and bashes The Rock in the face as he returns to his feet. Cena jumps back to the outside to take hold of a steel chair and strikes The Rock no fewer than 20 times. Cena retrieves a garbage can from under the ring and does the unthinkable. Taking his trucker cap, his “Rise Above Hate” tee and the corresponding arm and wrist bands, Cena tosses all into the can and burns it before flipping off the crowd.

From his jorts pocket, Cena produces a set of handcuffs and restrains The Rock. Cena drags the steel ring steps into the ring and proceeds to drop The Rock with an FU across the stairs. Still handcuffed, The Rock is locked in the STFU as Cena forces his Wrestlemania opponent to pass out. EMTs rush to the ring to help The Rock onto a stretcher. Cena continues to mock both The Rock and the crowd, climbing the turnbuckle to mimic The Rock’s fist raised pose. The fans have started raining down garbage upon the ring.

Officials begin wheeling The Rock on the stretcher up the entrance ramp, but Cena decides he’s not finished. Cena runs up the ramp and chases off the technicians, leaving the prone Rock alone on the stretcher. Cena glares one last time at the crowd before forcibly wheeling The Rock’s stretcher off the stage and into the electrical equipment below. Sparks fly and equipment wires are strewn everywhere as the Rock lies motionless, still strapped to the stretcher. Cena asks for a mic and Wade Barrett is waiting on the ramp to give him one. Cena tells the crowd that he’s done with all of them and tells The Rock “Now you have a reason for disappearing until Wrestlemania.” Cena slams down the mic and walks off with Barrett and the remaining Nexus members to end the show.
　
　
　

WWE Survivor Series Fantasy Card PPV Results 11/20/11 Pt. 4

Mark Henry v. The Big Show for the World Heavyweight Championship

Mark Henry enters first to his never before used theme "The Wall" followed by The Big Show. Match opens with formal ring intros and an intense staredown before a collar and elbow tie-up. Henry breaks the hold first, takes to the ropes and throws a body block and Show doesn't budge. Show takes to the rope himself and throws a shoulder block of his own with no effect. Both men then take to the ropes in opposite directions, but Show’s reaction time is slightly better and he throws a nasty spear, very nearly picking up the pinfall.

Henry quickly returns to his feet and exchanges a series of headbutts with The Big Show. A particularly gnarly headbutt opens up a gash over Henry’s left eye, which incenses The World’s Strongest Man who throw a series of three clotheslines that stagger Big Show, but fail to knock him off his feet. Henry summons the adrenaline from his injury to deliver a ring-rattling scoop powerslam. Henry follows up with a Jumping Elbow Drop and collects a 2 1/2 count. Henry disputes the count with the ref while Show recuperates. Show recovers and drops Henry with a Sidewalk Slam and heads to the top rope.

A rumbling Madison Square Garden rattles the rafters with a “Randy Savage” chant as Show leaps from the top and delivers the most devastating Diving Elbow Drop scored to date. Show goes for the cover, but Henry gets his foot on the bottom rope. Show locks on a Dragon Sleeper and connects with The Final Cut for another two count. Show tries again, this time with the Showstopper Leg Drop for another two.

Growing impatient, Show cinches in The Colossal Clutch in an attempt to get the World’s Strongest Man to tap out. Henry struggles and writhes to break the hold before finally marching on his elbows to the bottom rope to force the break of the hold. Big Show sits back, perplexed as to what it will take to dispatch of the World Champion. Show locks in an Abodominal Stretch, but after several minutes of struggling, Henry finds it in himself to break the hold with an incredible hip toss.

Show digs into his arsenal and tosses Henry to the buckle, delivering five overhand chops before letting Henry stagger out of the corner and into a Cobra Clutch Backbreaker. Show signals for a chokeslam and gets his hand around Henry’s throat. Upon the lift, Henry escapes the grip, whips Show to the corner and crushes him with a Body Avalanche.

As Show leaves the corner, Henry demonstrates incredible strength, hoisting the World’s Largest Athlete over his head and dropping him with a Military Press Slam. As Show crawls to the middle rope, the relentless Henry continues his barrage with a Leapfrog Guillotine, landing on his feet on the outside. The World Champion crawls back into the ring and delivers a Running Splash to a prone Big Show. Henry slashes his throat to signal the end and scales to the middle rope for a Slingshot Splash and connects. Somehow, Big Show escapes the pinfall at the last possible second and for Henry, frustration has given way to disbelief.

Show regains his feet and begins tossing a flurry of body blows before taking hold for another chokeslam. This time, Show is successful in his attempt and Henry’s impact rattles the canvas. Show begins to rage and balls up his fist. Just as Henry had done earlier, Show hoists the World Champion over his head Gorilla Press style before dropping Henry directly into the path of Show’s waiting WMD. Henry crumbles to the mat and the World Title is almost certain to change hands. Out of nowhere, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel and Michael McGillicutty jump the barricade and hop onto the ring apron, creating the distraction for the referee and the opening for Ezekiel Jackson and Mason Ryan to jump the barricade on the other end of the ring.

Jackson and Ryan collaborate on a double chokeslam of their own and jump back through the crowd. The trio on the other end leave the ringside area without a fight just as Henry is getting back to his feet. The World Champion climbs to the top rope and delivers and UNBELIEVABLE moonsault before lifting Big Show clean off the canvas and dropping him with The World’s Strongest Slam for the three count.

Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Mark Henry

Henry celebrates his successful title defense after the match, but the lights go down shortly thereafter and it begins raining in the arena. As the rain clears, A man driving a tram comes down the entrance ramp. As the tram approaches, we see that the driver is Paul Bearer and that the vehicle is carrying the immobile body of The Undertaker, just as we left him at Wrestlemania. Bearer holds the urn up to the light and a bolt of lightning passes through it, knocking it out of Bearer’s hands and striking the tram; causing it to burst into flames with The Undertaker still aboard.

Dumbstruck by what he is witnessing, Henry watches as the tram burns. As the smoke and fire begin to clear, “Ain’t No Grave” begins to play and a rejuvenated Undertaker stands on the charred tram before him, motionless. Distracted by this phenomena, Henry fails to witness DANIEL BRYAN approaching from behind. Bryan springboards from the top rope and delivers a missile dropkick to the back of Henry’s head. In this time, The Big Show has also regained his bearings. Show clocks Henry with another WMD and the World Champion drops like a stone. Big Show leaves the ring, frustrated that he came up short.

The lights come back up and The Undertaker has vanished. Daniel Bryan goes to the ringside area and grabs his Money In The Bank Briefcase, handing it to Charles Robinson. Robinson gives word to Justin Roberts, Roberts makes the announcement that Daniel Bryan is cashing in his MITB briefcase and the crowd ERUPTS. Henry staggers back to his feet and the ref signals for the bell to ring.

Mark Henry v. Daniel Bryan for the World Heavyweight Championship
A groggy Henry falls quick victim to a Running Leg Lariat that brings him to his knees. Bryan throws a series of six roundhouse kicks to Henry’s torso and shoulders before winding up and planting the seventh squarely into the World Champion’s right temple. Daniel Bryan locks in the crossface to a defenseless Mark Henry and with very little persuasion, an exhausted Henry taps out and the Madison Square Garden crowd comes ABSOLUTELY UNGLUED.

Winner and NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Daniel Bryan

An understandably ecstatic Daniel Bryan stage dives into the crowd and begins body surfing those in attendance. After ten minutes of making the rounds around the arena, Bryan returns to the ring and is finally awarded the belt. Bryan climbs up on the barricade and holds the title high for all fans to rejoice in. The new World Champion receives congratulations from every member of the broadcast table and makes his way back up the entrance ramp. Daniel Bryan is your NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION.

Kevin Nash backstage being interrogated by his teammates. Nash tries to reason with them, telling them that Wade Barrett is clearly trying to stir the pot and make everyone paranoid. Nash insists that he has nothing now nor ever to do with Wade Barrett or the Nexus. Christian discusses Nash’s history with both Triple H and his history of forming renegade factions. Miz chimes in saying that he has reason to suspect that a former Outsider is more than capable of an inside job. Nash’s teammates wander off. R-Truth leaves with a few parting words, saying that if it’s one thing he can’t stand, it’s being okey-doked by a conspiracy...

Another PPV Promo is run announcing that The 40-Man Royal Rumble is 10 Weeks Away.

Randy Orton cuts a backstage promo talking about how this year's upcoming Royal Rumble takes place in his hometown of St. Louis and makes the observation for the last five years, the superstar who won the match has failed to win the title at Wrestlemania. Orton says rest assured if he enters the Rumble match this year that that statistic will change.

WWE Survivor Series PPV Fantasy Card Results 11/20/11 Pt. 3

Traditional Survivor Series 5-on-5 Elim. Tag Match: Team Gabriel v. Team Slater

This match disintegrated into bedlam quickly. Jey Uso and Jinder Mahal start. Mahal attempts to lock in a full nelson slam, but Uso counters out and connects with a thrust kick to the midsection and a Superkick. Jey tags to Jimmy and both hit top rope splashes to dispatch of Jinder Mahal.

Michael McGillicutty rushes in and floors Jimmy Uso with a McGillicutter for a quick three. With the count now even, Jey Uso connects with an Alley-Us Samoan Drop but two men in streets jump the barricade and begin beating down Jey Uso, drawing a disqualification of McGillicutty.

A closer look reveals it to be the returning Skip Sheffield and Husky Harris. Sheffield clobbers Jey Uso with a Lariat while Harris follows up with his Senton Splash. With McGillicutty disqualified, JTG enters the battle and logs a three count on Jey Uso.

JTG goes to celebrate the victory with Slater, McGillicutty and Otunga, only to realize that all three have stepped down off of the apron. JTG looks to the other corner and sees that Justin Gabriel, Mason Ryan, Ezekiel Jackson and the two intruders have stepped off the apron and slid out of the ring. Slowly but surely, all eight men mark their positions and surround the ring. All at once, they slide into the ring and form a circle around JTG and it’s all too obvious what has transpired. This match was a set up from the beginning to make a statement. And so, the savage 8-on-1 beatdown begins.

Result: No Contest

Slater hits Sweetness, Otunga drops JTG with a spinebuster, McGillicutty hits his Rolling Cutter, Sheffield nearly decapitates JTG with another Lariat while Harris crushes his sternum with another Senton Splash. Mason Ryan and Ezekiel Jackson stun the former member of Cryme Tyme with a Double Chokeslam. Moments later, Wade Barrett enters the ring, all but solidifying what he was saying earlier. Jackson helps a limp JTG back to his feet and hoists him onto Barrett’s shoulders with a Military Press. Barrett plants JTG with Wasteland and Justin Gabriel leaps to the top rope, contemplates life for two to three minutes and executes a flawless 450 Splash.

Barrett grabs the mic and reintroduces himself as a partner in leadership of the newly re-formed NEXUS. Barrett warns that indeed someone in the main event is planning on betraying his teammates tonight, and aligning himself as co-leader of the Nexus. Barrett promises that under this new form of leadership, Nexus will be more militant, more destructive and more dangerous than ever before. The group of nine stand in the ring, defiantly raising one fist in solidarity.

A knock at Triple H’s dressing room door. Triple H invites them in and its Shawn Michaels with Sean Waltman. After exchanging pleasantries, Michaels and Waltman get down to business and Michaels tells Hunter that he knows him too well to not know what he’s planning tonight and begs him not to go through with it. Waltman tells The Game not to throw away a fifteen year friendship over a business matter. Triple H hesitates, then tells both that in seventeen years working for this company, he’s come to find out that nothing’s for certain; injuries, titles even friendships. He says he can damn well guarantee one thing though--Kevin Nash will not walk away from Survivor Series under his own power.

Elimination Tag Match: Team Phoenix (Beth Phoenix, Natalya, Tamina) v. Team Kelly (Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres, Alicia Fox)

Match gets underway as Natalya locks in a side headlock, eventually drifting into a Rear Naked Choke. Eve fights back out and executes a float over suplex for a two count. Natalya returns to her feet and walks directly into a single-leg drop kick. Eve lifts Natalya and drops her with a snap neckbreaker for two. Eve sets up for a Samoan Drop, unaware that Tamina has made a blind tag in the process. Eve prepares to execute a top rope Moonsault, but Phoenix drags Natalya out of the ring at the last minute, sending Eve crashing to the canvas. Capitalizing on a downed Eve, Tamina scales to the top and executes a crushing Superfly Splash and records the three count, eliminating Eve.

Immediately after the pinfall, Alicia Fox springboards over the top rope and leg drops Tamina across the neck. Waiting for Tamina to return to her feet, Alicia Fox connects with a nasty Scissors Kick and picks up the three count.

Alicia turns around and walks directly into a discus clothesline. Natalya drills Alicia into the mat with a Running Powerslam and locks in a sharpshooter. Alicia struggles valiantly for several moments before Natalya bridges and places an incredible amount of torque on the hold. Natalya drops directly to the mat, placing as much torque on the sharpshooter as possible. Unaware that her shoulders are on the mat, Natalya inadvertently pins herself in unison with Alicia Fox’ furious tapping and both are simultaneously eliminated.

Beth Phoenix and Kelly Kelly glare at each other from across the ring and charge from opposite corners. Kelly wins the initial showdown, taking down Phoenix with a Lou Thesz Press and reverting into “Psycho Bitch” mode with a flurry of fists.

Phoenix attempts a retreat, but Kelly hits a one-handed bulldog and repeatedly slams Beth’s face into the canvas. Kelly forces Phoenix back to her feet and slams her back to the mat with a sitout facebuster, but still only gets a two count. Beth finally regains her bearings and Irish whips Kelly into the ropes, but Kelly counters with a headscissors takedown for two. Kelly tries to keep momentum, but her kick is blocked and countered into an attempted Glam Slam. Kelly counters on the descent, however and gets another two count on a victory roll.

Phoenix gets back to her feet and swings wildly for a clothesline, but Kelly dodges, finally connecting with K2 and logs a three count.

Sole Survivor: Kelly Kelly

Kelly celebrates her victory over the Diva’s Champion, but the celebration is short-lived as senior referee Mike Chioda comes down the entrance ramp to consult with Chad Patton, replaying the tape and concluding that the pinfall is null and void as Beth Phoenix had her foot underneath the bottom rope. Chioda orders the match be restarted.

Kelly tries to reason with the referee staff, but the bell has already rung. Disappointed but determined, Kelly whips Beth with all of her strength into the corner. Kelly follows up with a Handspring Back Elbow, but gets captured in the corner. Beth Phoenix ascends the turnbuckle with Kelly in tow, until standing atop the top turnbuckle, and delivers the most devastating Glam Slam possible from the top to the mat. Beth Phoenix picks up the three count and the win.

Sole Survivor: Beth Phoenix

Natalya and Tamina return to the ring to congratulate Beth Phoenix, but they’re not through just yet. Taking the unconscious Kelly, Phoenix applies Pin-Up Strong and has to be stopped by WWE officials and road agents. Kelly does a stretcher job and the Divas of Doom stand victorious.

Backstage and CM Punk is being interrogated by his teammates as it concerns his loyalties to the team effort tonight. Punk tells Cena, Sheamus and The Rock that he has far better, far more entertaining things to do than sabotage the team’s efforts for the fun of it. Punk reminds them that he already commandeered the Nexus and moved on to bigger and better things. Despite his insistence, Cena, the Rock and Sheamus all walk away skeptical of whom they suspect to be the sketchiest member of their team.

Backstage with Scott Stanford and Awesome Truth. Stanford asks if they have any thoughts regarding tonight’s main event or the rumors of new management of the Nexus that Wade Barrett is circulating. Miz and Truth both glare at Stanford and storm off without a word.

A video package runs recapping the highlights of the Mark Henry-Big Show feud and turns focus to tonight’s World Heavyweight Championship Match.

WWE Survivor Series Fantasy PPV Results 11/20/11 Pt. 2

-Backstage with Scott Stanford and John Cena. Stanford asks Cena if he'll be able to put recent tensions with The Rock aside to help their Survivor Series team coexist tonight. Cena recaps his role in last year's Survivor Series where he was up against a wall between giving the title to Wade Barrett or getting fired. Cena tells Stanford that he'll do as he did last year and do the right thing for the greater good. Typical Cena fodder here.

-Back to the ring with Justin Roberts who introduces Michael Cole's replacement at the broadcast desk, New York City's own Matt Striker. Striker returns to the broadcast desk to a respectable hometown ovation and emphasizes his excitement to return to calling the action.

-The United States Champion enters, understandably without Vickie Guerrero and explains that due in large part to his actions earlier this evening and by order of Interim RAW GM John Laurinaitis that the match with Zack Ryder has now been changed into a No Disqualification Match. Ziggler says that this is fine with him and that the stipulation plays to his advantage given Ryder's current condition. Ziggler gives Ryder sixty seconds to answer his challenge, knowing full well that Ryder won’t make it to the ring in time. A cascade of boos rains down from the crowd and deafening chants of “We Want Ryder” fill the Manhattan arena. Ziggler begins to count down from ten and Ryder’s music cues up at 2. A visibly wounded Ryder limps down to ringside behind INCREDIBLE fan support.

Dolph Ziggler v. Zack Ryder-No DQ Match for the United States Championship

Ziggler continues his beatdown before the bell as Ryder attempts to crawl into the ring. Ryder whipped to the turnbuckle with force as Dolph continues showing off. Ziggler mocks Ryder with his “L.I.” hand signal as he waits for him to get back to his feet. Ziggler blasts Ryder with a Superkick. Ryder is clearly beaten, but the champion isn’t satisfied with just beating his opponent on this night.

Dolph slaps on the Sleeper. Ryder refuses to quit, eventually fighting out of the hold, sending Ziggler crashing into the turnpost. A groggy Ryder throws a Broski Boot, knocking Ziggler senseless, but the effort takes too much out of Ryder and he can’t capitalize with a cover. The champion eventually regains his bearings and resumes his assault on the challenger.

Ziggler hits a Neck Snap and follows up with a Leaping Elbow Drop for a two count. Ziggler locks the downed Ryder into a side headlock and executes a headstand bridge for extra torque. The champion releases the hold when he decides that he’s still not satisfied.

The champion helps Ryder back to his feet and promptly drops him with a Fame Asser but only gets two. Somehow Ryder still has something left in the tank. Ryder struggles back to his feet, and Ziggler attempts the ZigZag but Ryder grabs the top rope for leverage and responds with the Rough Ryder. Ziggler kicks out at two, and the challenger is stunned.

At a loss, Ryder quickly falls victim to the ZigZag. An infuriated Ziggler wants to finish Ryder for good, so the champion retreats to the outside and grabs a steel chair. Ziggler proceeds to strike Ryder no fewer than a dozen times before throwing the chair down in disgust. Ziggler grabs another chair and prepares to swing, but the chair is caught in the backswing by Randy Orton. Orton takes the chair away and jams the chair three times into Ziggler’s midsection before blasting him over the head with it. With Ziggler down, Orton unfolds the chair and sets it down in the middle of the ring. The viper helps the champion back to his feet before dropping his face through the seat of the chair with a catastrophic RKO. Orton helps Ryder back to his feet and helps direct traffic. Zack connects with The Zack Attack to Ziggler’s injured neck and picks up the three.

Winner and NEW United States Champion: Zack Ryder

-Orton walks back up the entrance ramp, stopping to look over his shoulder to admire his retribution. A battered Ryder celebrates with the New York City faithful and several “Broskis” who helped sign his Twittition.

-Backstage with Theodore Long and Aksana in what looks to be another wasted segment until Mark Henry enters the room and tells Aksana to get lost. Henry tells Long that he’ll agree to defend the World Heavyweight Championship against The Big Show on the condition that it be The World’s Largest Athlete’s last chance at the gold. Teddy Long tells Mark that if he has it in him to put The Big Show away decisively tonight, he won’t have to worry about him challenging again anyway. Mark Henry tells Long to count on it, then leaves the office shaking his head.

-Alberto Del Rio backstage with Christian discussing the main event tonight and officially calling truce to the business that they had with each other earlier in the year. Edge disrupts the conversation and tells Christian that since he had a hard time getting the title back from Orton and got utterly crushed in his attempt to take the title from Mark Henry, that trying to take the title from the Big Show will be next to impossible. The Rated-R Superstar tells Christian to please, for the sake of everyone, STOP ASKING FOR ONE MORE MATCH and closes by acknowledging Del Rio with an “Oh, Hey Champ” before slapping the taste out of his mouth and walking off.

-Back in the ring with Hunico, Epico and Primo who have issued an impromptu challenge to Sin Cara to find two tag team partners to compete in an elimination match tonight. Sin Cara shows up on the entrance ramp and waits as ALEX RILEY’s theme music hits to an huge ovation. The ramp bursts into flames as KANE makes his return to the ring as well. The trio in the ring quickly realize that they may have stepped into something.

Elimination Tag Match: Sin Cara, Alex Riley, and Kane v. Los Aviadores

Realizing they have nothing to lose, all three attack Kane with a combination Codebreaker, Backstabber and Swanton Bomb but can only come up with a two count. Kane gets back to his feet and cleans house on all three before tagging to Riley.

Epico charges in and connects with a Tilt-A-Whirl DDT but only logs two. Epico sets up for another Codebreaker, but Riley catches Epico on the fly and counters into a resounding spinebuster. A-Ry connects with a Riley Elevation DDT and drops Epico with the A-Bomb before tagging to Sin Cara. The luchador leaps into the ring with a springboard senton bomb before rebounding with a lionsault and collecting the three count.

Primo rushes in to follow up throwing a flurry of mounted punches to a downed Sin Cara and grabbing a leg to prevent a tag. Cara responds with an enziguri and quickly tags to Kane. Primo tries to back out quickly, but Kane captures and Chokeslams him through the canvas. Kane helps Primo back to his feet and appears to set up for another chokeslam, but instead lifts Primo to the top turnbuckle and tags to Sin Cara. Cara leapfrogs to the top rope and drops Primo with a Moonsault Side Slam from the top rope for the three count.

All alone, Hunico goes for broke and charges Sin Cara but instantly falls victim to a La Mistica Fujiwara Armbar and is forced to tap out.

Survivors: Sin Cara, Alex Riley and Kane

Wade Barrett backstage with Jack Korpela. Barrett comments on his earlier victory saying that tonight begins a changing of the guard and that the winds of change are blowing in WWE. He says the Barrett Barrage will not stop until the World Heavyweight Championship falls into his hands, but that for the time being, all of that is secondary. Barrett alludes that he has it on good authority based on loud locker room chatter that a certain superstar involved in tonight’s main event is working as a double agent and intends to sabotage their team before the night is over. Barrett insists that he has no idea who the culprit is, but says he’s certain that they’ll display their true colors tonight.

A promo is run for next month’s TLC Pay-Per-View

A mysterious promo is run that features only the phrase "It Begins--January 2."

WWE Survivor Series PPV Fantasy Card Results 11/20/11 Pt. 1

-WWE's 2011 Survivor Series pay-per-view opens with a commemorative video package celebrating historic moments at Survivor Series in its 25-year history, with highlights including the debut of The Undertaker, The Montreal Screwjob, The Fall of the Alliance, The First Elimination Chamber Match and Cena’s reluctant three-count on Wade Barrett. The package concludes with a frame-by-frame profile of each of the participants in tonight’s main event elimination tag match teasing that one or more of them will leave their mark on Survivor Series history tonight.

-And we’re live from Madison Square Garden as Jim Ross, at the request of Interim RAW GM, joins the broadcast table and welcomes us to the 25th Anniversary of Survivor Series. In celebration of this monumental occasion, WWE has customized a broadcast booth to house ALL FIVE commentators to call the action tonight.

Traditional Survivor Series 5-on-5 Elim. Tag Match: Team Orton v. Team Barrett

We go to the ring and Team Orton enters first, with John Morrison leading the way, followed by the Tag Team Champions, Air Boom, then Ted DiBiase before Randy Orton rounds up the troops at ringside.

Vickie Guerrero enters to “Excuse Me” and the usual cascade of boos before announcing that as a “Survivor Series Special” she has extended her clientele to another member of tonight’s elimination tag match. With that she introduces Jack Swagger and her newest client, Drew McIntyre. Cody Rhodes enters next before Tyson Kidd enters accompanied by Captain Barrett.

Barrett tries to formulate a strategy of attack on the entrance ramp before sending Swagger, Kidd and McIntyre forth. As the trio approaches the ring apron, they are promptly met by the trio of Morrison and Air Boom nailing a Triple Plancha before the match can even start. Chaos ensues with Barrett and Rhodes charging into the ring, only for Rhodes to be met with a clothesline by DiBiase that sends him over the top rope to the floor. Barrett is nearly dropped with an RKO, but blocks and retreats to the outside. A standoff takes place before the referee restores order and we’re ready to start.

Cody Rhodes starts off with Evan Bourne. Bourne comes at Rhodes furiously with a frenzy of kick variations before concluding with a set of three frankensteiners that ends with Rhodes being dropped from his knees face first into the canvas. Bourne ascends the top rope for Air Bourne, but can’t capitalize quickly enough. Rhodes rolls out of the way and Bourne corrects his position to land on his feet. Bourne attempts a shiranui, but it’s far too easily countered into Cross Rhodes. Rhodes spikes Bourne head first into the mat to score the first elimination of the bout.

Ted DiBiase enters the contest. A traditional collar-and-elbow tie-up results in a solid flurry of chain wrestling. Cody tries an early pin attempt, but a re-energized DiBiase kicks out before the ref has a chance to log a 1-count. Rhodes maintains control with a headlock, but DiBiase tosses him off only to have Cody come off the ropes with a Goldust throat thrust. Cody follows up with a knee drop and a flying lariat as DiBiase gets back to his feet. Rhodes attempts a top-rope Moonsault and very impressively lands on his feet as DiBiase rolls out of the way. Cody regains his bearings and drops DiBiase with a Silver Spoon DDT.

Feeling indestructible, Rhodes begins to grandstand. Rhodes attempts to connect with the Beautiful Disaster, but DiBiase ducks out of the way and attempts a rebound clothesline of his own. Cody dodges and positions for Cross Rhodes, but before he can execute the hold, DiBiase counters BEAUTIFULLY into Dream Street and picks up the surprise three-count as Cody is eliminated. In disbelief, Cody argues the count with the referee before getting escorted away by officials.

This draws in Drew McIntyre, who blindsides DiBiase with a Big Boot. McIntyre helps DiBiase to his feet and attempts to put him away with The Scot Drop, but Ted grabs the top rope for leverage, sending Drew crashing to the mat and buying DiBiase time to tag to Kofi Kingston. Kofi enters with a Springboard Body Press and records a two-count before McIntyre scrambles to the corner to tag in Jack Swagger. Taking a page from McIntyre’s book, Swagger plants a boot directly in Kofi’s face before applying a waistlock in an attempt for a German suplex, only to have Kofi counter into a victory roll and another two count.

Swagger rises to his feet and walks into a springboard back elbow. Swagger rises again and is dropped with a double Mongolian Chop. Swagger gets up a third time and is monkey flipped to the other end of the ring. Infuriated, Swagger retreats to the outside for a pow-wow with Barrett and company. Kofi waits casually in the corner as Swagger returns to the ring. The two-time All-American charges the corner and walks directly into a Pendulum Kick and Kofi ascends the ropes as Swagger stumbles out of the corner. Kingston attempts a high-flying Body Press but is captured mid-dive. As Swagger attempts to capitalize, Kofi rolls through into a Steamboat-style roll-up for two-and-a-half. Kingston drops Swagger with S.O.S. but can only get a two-count also. As Kofi readies for the Boom Drop, Swagger has it scouted and captures Kingston with an Ankle Lock on the descent. Kofi struggles at first, then counters with a back foot enziguri that pushes Swagger into the corner. Kofi gingerly charges on the sore ankle and lands a Koronco Buster. But on the roll-down, Kofi is caught in perfect position for a Swagger Gutwrench Powerbomb. Swagger covers the flattened Kingston for the elimination.

DiBiase re-enters and Swagger tags to McIntyre, who quickly catches a flying High Knee to the face. DiBiase follows up with a Million $ Fist Drop and an elevated spinebuster for two. DiBiase goes to lock in Dream Street again but Cody Rhodes re-enters the match and drops DiBiase with Cross Rhodes. As officials escort Rhodes to the exit AGAIN, this opens the door enough for McIntyre to drop Ted with a Hangman’s neckbreaker and FutureShock for the next elimination.

Enter Randy Orton. Orton trades holds briefly with McIntyre before Drew gains the upper hand and drops the Viper with a Jumping Arm Breaker. Priming for the kill, McIntyre preps to deliver another FutureShock DDT, getting Orton into position. Orton stealthily escapes the hold and counters with a devastating RKO. Orton tags to Morrison who immediately scales the ropes and delivers Starship Pain to log the three count and earn the elimination.

Barrett finally enters the match and jumps Morrison from behind, delivering a Spinning Side Slam for a two count. The captain attempts a Diving Elbow Smash, but Morrison rolls out of the way. Morrison takes advantage of a downed Barrett by throwing a knee into his face, but only gets two. A standing shooting star press gets two and a half, but still not enough. Morrison attempts a Moonsault Side Slam, but Barrett throws elbows to counter out and set up for Wasteland. Morrison wriggles free and sets up for a Flying Chuck, but Barrett ducks, throws a mule kick to Morrison’s midsection and tags to Swagger.

Swagger capitalizes with a running knee lift before cinching in an abdominal stretch. Morrison expends most of his energy escaping the hold and sets up for Moonlight Drive, but it’s easily countered into a back suplex. Swagger attempts a Swagger Bomb in the corner, but Morrison gets the knees up. Morrison attempts another Starship Pain, but discovers that his ribs won’t support the move. Morrison instead attempts a Nitro Blast Superkick, but is caught upon delivery and placed in Swagger’s Ankle Lock. Morrison struggles valiantly for several minutes before Swagger applies a leg grapevine and simply has no other option but to tap out.

With Orton all alone, Swagger first approaches, then decides against it, instead tagging in Tyson Kidd. Kidd springboards from the top rope and lands directly into and RKO for a quick three count.

Swagger charges, but Orton meets him first with a Snap Scoop Powerslam for two. Orton throws a European Uppercut and follows with a Lou Thesz Press before executing an Orton Stomp and punctuating with a thunderous knee drop. Orton hits the inverted backbreaker and drapes a wounded Swagger over the middle rope before dropping him with a vicious Viper DDT. Orton moves in for the kill and plants Swagger with the third RKO of the evening for the elimination.

A livid Vickie Guerrero storms into the ring and begins shoving Orton, much to his disbelief. Vickie continues to berate Orton, poking him in the chest before finally slapping him across the face. Swagger returns to his feet and punches the ref’s lights out for logging the pinfall. Swagger gets back in Orton’s face and Orton reciprocates with another RKO to Swagger, Vickie attempts to leave the ring, but Orton grabs her by the back of her head. Orton shrugs off her prior abuses and drives Vickie to the mat with yet another RKO that absolutely UNGLUES Madison Square Garden. People are on their feet applauding Orton. As the smoke clears, the wheels begin to turn and Orton gets that sick smile on his face. Orton backs into the opposite corner and delivers the most devastating punt possible to Vickie Guerrero and the roof has come off of the arena. A “THANK YOU RANDY” chant erupts from the crowd.
Vickie does a stretcher job, and as Orton looks on, DOLPH ZIGGLER emerges through the crowd and slams Orton neck first into the canvas with a Zig Zag. As the referee comes to, Wade Barrett, who has been laying low since his tangle with Morrison, picks up the scraps of a prone Orton, dropping him with Wasteland to log the final three count.

SOLE SURVIVOR: Wade Barrett

-Barrett leaves the ring victorious while Ziggler admires his handiwork and runs back up the ramp to tend to Vickie while a furious Orton regains his composure, seething in the ring.

-Zack Ryder is seen backstage, fiddling with his flip camera, chatting up random expendable divas and excitedly announcing that he got enough signatures on his Twittition to have John Laurinaitis grant him the match he so desperately wanted, a United States Championship rematch with Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler jumps Ryder from behind, savagely beating on the Long Island Iced Z with every weapon within reach before finally throwing Ryder through both the catering table and a plate glass window. Ziggler approaches the downed Ryder and tells him that when it comes to the United States Championship, “I’m DEAD SERIOUS, BRO...”

-Michael Cole, in a desperate attempt for any last attention he can get, climbs up on the announce table and asks for the crowds attention. BOO, YOU SUCK...you know the routine by now. Cole ends up in the ring and just when no one in attendance can take anymore, Cole is interrupted by STEPHANIE MCMAHON. The Billion-Dollar Princess informs Michael Cole that the McMahon family has become exceedingly disappointed in Cole’s job performance as of late. Steph even produces the paperwork from the Nielsen Ratings that indicate that it’s not only the broadcast desk that has grown fatigued of Michael Cole, but the audience at home as well. In fact, every segment that Cole was featured prominently in over the last eight months has tested as the segment that has lost the most viewers on a weekly basis. Mrs. McMahon tells Cole that he has one last chance to salvage his career, in a match, or else he will be fired on the spot. Stephanie tells him to get ready because his match is next and it’s against DANIEL BRYAN.

Daniel Bryan v. Michael Cole (Michael Cole’s career is on the line)

Daniel Bryan, who has been waiting for this moment since his days on NXT, stalks Cole methodically. Cole backs himself into a corner, drops to his knees and begins begging Bryan to spare him his career. Bryan isn’t having any of it though, as he begins throwing roundhouse kicks to Cole’s ribs. Numb with pain, Cole is helpless as Bryan throws a crushing final kick to Cole’s temple. Cole crumples to the mat and is promptly locked into Cattle Mutilation and the referee has no option but to stop the match as Cole is unconscious.

Winner: Daniel Bryan

-Cole is helped back to his feet by officials so as he can be told in person by Stephanie McMahon that he has been FIRED. Cole is escorted out of the arena as the crowd serenades him.

NFL Midseason Report Card

Yes. I am well aware that midseason was technically two weeks ago. However, I was content to withhold assessment until after all 32 teams had completed their bye week, which I presumed would have been this past Sunday. As it happens, the NFL decided to create an erratic bye week schedule, creating a one week gap between the final four teams to get a bye and the rest of the league. With that said, I present my perspective on the standings of each individual team entering Week 11:

1. Green Bay Packers (9-0): Advice to Aaron Rodgers--Stay humble, stay focused and most importantly, stay healthy. The Packers look close to unstoppable at this point, but the defense is FAR from indestructible. The moment this team lets their guard down, should Rodgers succumb to injury (perhaps another concussion), losses will begin to seep through the gate. The Packers can't afford that with The 49ers nipping at their heels in the NFC Playoff race, not to mention the fierce competition in their own division. Grade: A+

2. San Francisco 49ers (8-1): A win over the Cardinals on Sunday plus a loss by the Seahawks can lock up the woeful West, but while San Fran is riding a seven-game winning streak, close contests with Cleveland and Washington and a less-than-productive victory over the Bengals raises questions about what they can accomplish in January. Grade: A-

3. Houston Texans (7-3): Unexpected to say the least. Houston is on its way to its first playoff appearance since they were the Oilers. The issue now becomes, with Matt Leinart now at the helm for an ailing Matt Schaub in addition to the absences of Mario Williams and Andre Johnson, how long can the Texans continue to defy the odds? A week off should give these guys time to recover. Their losses raise eyebrows, though. Oakland and Baltimore are both real possiblities in the postseason and should they somehow make it to February, Drew Brees and the Saints could also be waiting. Grade: B

4. Pittsburgh Steelers (7-3): Being swept by The Ravens hurts badly, but for the moment, the Steelers are in control. The other loss came against a team that could very well jeopardize Homefield Advantage for the Steel City; Houston. The rest of the schedule looks manageable, but the return match with Cincinnati and an upcoming contest with San Francisco are cause for concern. In a week AFC West, the unpredictable Chiefs could also add wrinkles to the schedule. Grade: B

5. New Orleans Saints (7-3): The Saints escaped on Sunday. Period. Drew Brees and the Saints can't afford to play this sloppily coming off their bye week with games against the Giants, Lions, Titans (who are still very much alive in the AFC South) and a rematch with the Falcons on the horizon. Grade: B

6. New England Patriots (6-3): Despite the fact that they haven't returned to the Super Bowl since the year of 18-1, Tom Brady and company refuse to go away. The winning percentage of their remaining opponents suggests that the Pats should be a shoe-in for the postseason, but Belichick should remain on high alert. This is the time of year that some of the craziest, most unlikely phenomena occur. All three losses came against potential postseason adversaries; two lead their division. The other, Buffalo, isn't far out of the race. Grade: B-

7. Chicago Bears (6-3): For those of us who thought the NFC North had narrowed to a two-team race (myself included), apparently the Bears didn't get the memo. Even I sat up and took notice when Jay Cutler was benched Sunday...with the Bears ahead. Grade: B-

8. Baltimore Ravens (6-3): Joe Flacco's crew currently owns the #5 spot in the AFC bracket, but losses to the likes of Tennessee, Seattle and Jacksonville as well as a last minute save against Arizona are causes for great concern. Four of the Ravens' next seven games are against teams that could conceivably win their respective divisions. Can they get the job done? Grade: B-

9. New York Giants (6-3): They lead their division, but what's their identity? Who can we expect in the event that they make it to the postseason? Should we expect the team that looked like world beaters when they knocked off the Patriots at Foxboro? Or might we look for the team that lost their games by a two-score margin to the Redskins and Seahawks and struggled to top the Cardinals and Dolphins in the last minute? Easily the worst schedule down the stretch, games against the Jets, Saints, Packers, two against the Cowboys and even next Sunday against the Eagles won't allow for sloppy play. Grade: B-

10. Cincinnati Bengals (6-3): The Bengals have played admirably this season. They've been in every game that they've played. This is especially remarkable considering the rookie combination of Andy Dalton and A.J. Green. The next three games will be critical divisional contests with a shot at redemption versus the Steelers in Week 13. Cincy's playoffs hope hinge almost exclusively on how they perform in their doubleheader with Baltimore, the rematch with Pittsburgh and a later contest with Houston that could really test their mettle. Grade: B-

11. Detroit Lions (6-3): The Lions are finally starting to click after years of futility. Problem is that the three games they've lost have a real chance of cutting Detroit's playoff run short. Grade: B-

12. Oakland Raiders (5-4): Good News: The Raiders are part of one of the weaker divisions in the league, so the likelihood of winning the West is strong. Bad News: All three of their challengers are only a game behind and two of them own a tiebreaker over Silver and Black. Grade: C+

13. Dallas Cowboys (5-4): A vicious schedule ahead for the Giants really plays to the Cowboys' advantage. They're knocking on the door to the playoffs, but Romo's crippling inconsistency could turn an otherwise manageable docket into the furthest thing from a cakewalk. Grade: C+

14. Tennessee Titans (5-4): Don't sleep on Matt Hasselbeck just yet. It's just the Titans style to chase Houston all the way to Week 17, leaving the division up in the air until 2012. The next three weeks will tell alot about how the AFC South trends. Grade: C+

15. Atlanta Falcons (5-4): Why Mike Smith, Why? With the Saints going into their bye week, Atlanta had an opportunity to take the division lead away. If Atlanta doesn't come away with the NFC South, the coach will be answering for that one until next August. Half of their loss column came against division rivals. The other two are fighting for the NFC North. It's not time to hit the panic button yet, but a win against another playoff contender (aside from the Lions) won't hurt. Grade: C+

16. New York Jets (5-4): Rex Ryan's goal at this point is to win out and hope that the Patriots finish 11-5. That's asking alot. The season sweep could prove really costly down the stretch, but the remaining schedule looks favorable for a wild card spot. The road to recovery begins Thursday night against the Broncos. Grade: C+

17. Buffalo Bills (5-4): If the Bills can get back on the ball and put themselves into neck-and-neck position with the Patriots again, they own the tiebreaker going into Week 17. But teams like San Diego and the Jets could REALLY screw things up. Grade: C+

18. Denver Broncos (4-5): It's a good thing that the Dolphins, Chiefs and Raiders all played so poorly. Otherwise, the Broncos would be 1-8, Tim Tebow would be an afterthought (as he should be) and the AFC West would be a three-team discussion. That being said, Tebow is still a pathetic excuse for a quarterback. Grade: C-

19. San Diego Chargers (4-5): What happened? These guys were 4-1 a month ago. If Phillip Rivers can't get this derailed train back on track, it could be Norv Turner's final season in SD (one could only hope) Chicago won't be easy. Grade: C-

20. Kansas City Chiefs (4-5): The Chiefs are playing much better than they should be. An 0-3 start that featured an 89-10 differential through the first two weeks and injuries to Jamal Charles and now Matt Cassel, the Chiefs bounced back with a four game winning streak and even briefly shared the division lead...but Tyler Palko might be the final nail in KC's coffin for the season. Grade: C-

21. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-5): Yet another team that took the division lead before the wheels fell off. Somewhere between being obliterated by San Francisco and a now three-game hangover that started with Chicago in London, the Bucs are on the bubble. You can't expect to get anywhere when you're only scoring 17 points per game. Grade: C-

22. Jacksonville Jaguars (3-6): If nothing else, Blaine Gabbert has something to build off of starting next season. Grade: D+

23. Seattle Seahawks (3-6): Surprising victories over Baltimore and the Giants aren't enough when you're in the bottom ten of every offensive category. Grade: D+

24. Arizona Cardinals (3-6): The Cards' injury report reads like a MASH unit. Arizona is barely breathing, but certainly must take some degree of satisfaction in knocking off the "Dream Team" last Sunday. Grade: D+

25. Cleveland Browns (3-6): They're still in the playoff race. Technically. If the Jaguars don't change that this week, the Bengals will next week. Grade: D+

26. Philadelphia Eagles (3-6): Wow. Where to start? Such high hopes met with equal disappointment. They can still turn it around and salvage their season, but they have left themselves ZERO room for error. Grade: D+

27. Washington Redskins (3-6): Mike Shanahan might want to contemplate a new team or retirement. Dana Snyder might want to contemplate resignation. The Redskins might want to contemplate the fact that they haven't made the postseason since 2007. Fail to the Redskins indeed. Grade: D+

28. Miami Dolphins (2-7): Two consecutive wins still isn't enough to overshadow the glaring 0-7 start. Particularly when neither team that they defeated is playing well enough to beat the Colts at this point. Grade: D-

29. St. Louis Rams (2-7): The two wins mean that Sam Bradford isn't on the hot seat yet, since Andrew Luck will doubtless go to the hapless Colts as an insurance policy for a deteriorating Peyton Manning. Grade: D-

30. Carolina Panthers (2-7): Welcome to the NFL, Cam Newton. Passing yards only count for so much when you're one of five teams mathematically eliminated from playoff contention before Thanksgiving. Grade: D-

31. Minnesota Vikings (2-7): It pains me to see how sharply Donovan McNabb has declined since the Eagles let him go. Christian Ponder? Get ready, kid. It's going to be rough sledding for a few seasons. Grade: D-

32. Indianapolis Colts (0-10): What do you say to a team that has gone 0-10 before they even got a break to catch their breath? Hang in there, guys...Andrew Luck is a mere six weeks away... Grade: F

Strap in NFL fans, December's going to be a wild spiral...