10 Superstars That Should Have Walked Out...And Stayed Out

We're about a month or so removed from the INCREDIBLY wise decision to remove Triple H from power and replace him with the infallible John Laurinaitis.

If you haven't figured out by now that I'm speaking ironically, this is NOT the article for you.

Nonetheless, the events that transpired in the weeks that followed had me reflecting pensively on the "no-confidence" vote and subsequent walk-out that put ol' Johnny Ace in control. I've been wondering if there were a few names in that crowd of fifty-five doubters that should have walked out and stayed out of the company for good. Lo and behold, I found a few that I would be more than happy to do without. So without further ado, I present the Troy Ruby "Get Lost" list:

10. Sin Cara No. 2 (A.k.a. Hunico)

-The Problem: Allow me to explain. Yes, the angle of "which Sin Cara is which?" can be entertaining for a short while (see Doink The Clown) and this one had potential. But somewhere between Booker T's inane ramblings about a black mark on one of the Sin Cara's boots, Michael Cole telling Josh Matthews to interview Sin Cara by asking "Where are you?" instead of "How are you?" and Hunico's character switching to the distinguishable black outfit in contrast with the fan favorite's blue attire, the angle was handled very poorly.

-Quick Fix and Replacement: The Mask vs. Mask match has since resolved the issue. Repackage, rename, reintroduce. The new angle with Epico and Primo is intriguing, but thus far is coming off as a lazier version of the Mexicools.

9. Yoshi Tatsu

-The Problem: His last relevant match was against Chris Jericho. On Superstars. And he lost. Yes, the man is talented, yes he has potential. But all of the war paint and Japanese power pop in the world won't change the fact that WWE isn't using him.

-The Quick Fix: The long awaited return of Brodus Clay. Bury him and cut your losses.

-The Replacement: Tajiri, Taka Michinoku, even Funaki would get more attention than Yoshi's been getting lately.

8. Ezekiel Jackson

-The Problem: Usually when Vince McMahon recruits a superstar who is too large to look comfortable working in the ring, he's had the great fortune of salvaging their career through exceptional mic and promo skills (see HOGAN) or a dynamic personality. Sadly, Big Zeke has neither. Give him A, Give him B, or give him the boot.

-The Quick Fix: This seems like an excellent choice for inductee into Mark Henry's Hall of Pain. Now THAT'S Domination.

-The Replacement: Slyck Wagner Brown. Trust me, the man has a PHENOMENAL personality and can actually work very well in the ring.

7. JTG

-The Problem: JTG has to be the luckiest man in the business. He's not over as a solo performer, he was barely over as a member of Cryme Tyme. He's not being used for anything beyond being Mason Ryan food, yet somehow he has survived every last budget cut that has come down the pike. How is he doing this?

-The Quick Fix: Nothing witty here. Big Show WMD to the face. The end.

-The Replacement: Jay Lethal. As Black Machismo. Can't think of a more fitting homage to one of the WWE's greatest of all time. Plus, Lethal actually has talent and charisma. Two things "Just Too Gangsta" never had.

6. Primo

-The Problem: Why? Do I really need to say anything? Primo hasn't been relevant since Carlito left (WWE dropped the ball on that one, by the way) A nice attempt to make Primo matter again by teaming him with Tito Colon (Epico) and Hunico, but anyone who's seen this kind of thing before knows that this faction will go absolutely nowhere.

-The Quick Fix: Have Hunico and Epico hit the skids, then blame Primo for their shortcomings. A luchador-style 2-on-1 beatdown should do the trick.

-The Replacement: Cheech Hernandez. The man has more character and works the crowd MILES better than Primo, plain and simple. Besides, he's a better fit for Epico and Hunico anyhow.

5. The Great Khali

-The Problem: The man has two speeds: slow and injured. Do away with him. NOW. Since 2006, it has been painfully obvious that he couldn't work beyond terrorizing The Undertaker and Kane because he was bigger. To think someone thought putting the World Championship on him was a good idea.

-The Quick Fix: Is right there in front of them. Khali is injured now. Pay him to stay home for the remainder of his contract and cut ties immediately if not sooner.

-The Replacement: Brodie Lee. Easily one of the best (if not the best) superstars in Dragon Gate USA. All the size of Khali with ten times the agility and in-ring skill.

4. Two Thirds of the Diva's Division:

-The Problem: is self-explanatory. Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres, The Bella Twins, Rosa Mendes, Aksana, A.J. and Kaitlyn. They're all just awful. None of them have the skill to have any place in WWE beyond the ringside area. The likes of Beth Phoenix, Natalya, Tamina and Kharma have proven that they have both the lineage and the ABILITY to get things done in the ring. The rest should hit the bricks and arrange for modeling contracts.

-The Quick Fix: The eight former names are collectively so untalented, that the four latter names should be able to dispatch of two apiece.

-The Replacements: Bring back Maryse, Michelle McCool (Never thought I'd miss her), Lita (Maybe one of the best in the Diva's division ever), Mickie James, Maria (still better than Kelly), Mickie James, and Melina (Personal issues aside, she's a better in-ring performer, period). Introduce the world to Sara Del Ray.

3. John Laurinaitis

-The Problem: Yes, Johnny Ace himself. Shocking, right? The man has all the personality and entertainment value of a flattened pine cone. Rest your vocal cords, Laryngitis. No one can hear what you're saying anyway. Go home.

-The Quick Fix: Have Vince McMahon return to wish Johnny the best in all his future endeavors and appoint a permanent RAW GM.

-The Replacement: JBL. It's going to happen anyway. But the absence of Johnny Ace will be greatly appreciated.

2. Michael Cole

-The Problem: The issue has been talked to death. I Hate Michael Cole with a fiery passion, but for none of the right reasons. In short, Michael Cole should have been written off WWE television permanently a decade ago when Stone Cold Steve Austin dealt him the beating of a lifetime. Granted, Cole is doing his job of playing the heel, the problem is he's not doing it right. Even Aubrey Sitterton of UGO has made the observation that Cole isn't "Get You Riled Up Bad", he's "Change The Channel Bad". Even the most casual observer, one who just started watching can tell you that there's a world of difference. Who knew all this time that Tazz was the better broadcast partner of the two on Smackdown? Ouch. Cole has delivered more cringe-inducing, uncomfortably bad television on a weekly basis in the past year than Paul Heyman did on commentary EVER. Go away Cole. Never come back.

-The Quick Fix: Should have been tonight. WWE Creative has decided to torture us for the foreseeable future, cursing us with this intestinal cyst for weeks and weeks to come. Should the day ever come, it should come at the hands of a Daniel Bryan Crossface (I refuse to call it the LaBell Lock) that remains locked in for a solid ten minutes before officials can break the hold.

-The Replacement: Matt Striker on commentary, The empty roster spot can go to either The Kings of Wrestling or either of the American Wolves.

1. Hornswoggle

-The Problem: He's the definition of useless. Finlay is gone. His premise has run its course. Still he lingers. For no good reason. Everyone over the age of four will tell you that he has long since worn out his welcome. Time for the "Little Bastard" to go.

-The Quick Fix: A modified Brogue Kick from Sheamus.

-The Replacement: A new set of ring ropes and a turkey club sandwich.

Once these wastes of roster space and air time are dealt with, then and only then can the company expect to move forward. Until then, expect more of the same; as CM Punk put it, a "colossal waste of time".

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